Snooty and Goon: The DUFF

If anyone's in the market for a Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot, this movie already assembled the right cast.

If anyone’s in the market for a Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot, this movie already assembled the right cast.

In a touching movie that will make you feel 17 Again, Mae Whitman plays The Girl Next Door, a Clueless kid who’s still Some Kind of Wonderful. Right before she’s about to The Graduate, a bunch of Heathers Can’t Hardly Wait to tell her she’s Superbad. Maybe Whitman isn’t Pretty in Pink, but She’s All That, and I would make her My Girl in a heartbeat! Will she be Saved! by some Footloose Prince Charming? Juno she will!

Sixteen Candles.

Click here to un-DUFF yourself!


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Impossible is just another Tuesday for us: Goon Reviews Flash “Fallout”

Let our powers combine!

Let our powers combine!

 

 

 

 

 

…So, I really want pizza.  Anyone else, anyone?  Just me then.  Okay.

We pick up right where last weeks episode left off, Barry and Caitlin running from the nuclear blast that was Firestorm.  Having survived and learning that there is no radiation from the blast, Barry and Caitlin head back to find what happened to Ronnie and Dr. Stein.  Lo and behold, they find them both alive and well, if their clothes are a little worse for wear.  They bring the two back to S.T.A.R. Labs and discover that apart from a slight fever, both are in perfect health.  Stein returns home to his wife and Ronnie and Caitlin spend some much needed time together.  While this happens, Joe takes Barry back to his old home and tells him what he and Cisco discovered about the night of the murder.  Naturally confused by this, Barry goes to the one person he knows that can give him some insight into time travel, Dr. Stein.  The two talk in fancy science terms for awhile, and we discover there is still a connection between Ronnie and Stein, via Stein sensing that Ronnie is in danger.  Barry goes to the rescue, and after some military induced acupuncture goes horrible wrong, he is able to escape with Caitlin and Ronnie.  They learn that General Eiling is still after the F.I.R.E.S.T.O.R.M. project.  Ronnie and Caitlin lay low with Barry and Joe for awhile while Stein hides out at S.T.A.R. Labs.  Things go pear shaped when Wells sells out Stein to Eiling, because he is a dick like that, but then pulls a 180 and helps to rescue him.  Through their connection, which continues to grow stronger, Ronnie is able to communicate with Stein and he and Barry go off to save him.  Barry pulls Stein out just before Eiling shoots him, but before they can escape Barry is hit with a phosphorus chemical that starts to burn.  To put it out he has to put himself into a vacuum, leaving Ronnie and Stein to get away on their own.  When escape is no longer an option, Wells tells them to merge together again, the two do so, but instead of fighting it they accept it, and thus Firestorm emerges, and kicks all sorts of ass.  With their new found abilities, Stein and Robbie decide to leave Central City, seeking out an old colleague of Stein’s who they think will be able to help them better understand their powers.  The share a sweet goodbye with their respective loves and fly off. (to be seen again in the Firestorm spin off) We close out with Barry telling Joe he will learn everything about what happened the night his mother was murdered so that when he goes back he can stop it, and with Wells, in his Reverse Flash outfit, kidnapping Eiling and throwing him to Gorilla Grodd.

So yeah, this episode was freaking amazing.  It feels like most of last week’s episode was build up to this one, and the pay off was fantastic.  Ronnie

Man, Cisco is gonna be pissed.

Man, Cisco is gonna be pissed.

and Stein’s animosity towards each other was well founded, but not annoying.  Having spent a year living in the same body is bound to leave some less than friendly feelings behind, but it was played more just left over anger over missing a year of their lives than as actually hatred towards each other.  Stein’s adopting Ronnie’s love of pizza was hilarious to watch play out.  The build up to their willing merge was well paced, and quite funny.  The small bits of banter between the two while they were merged was well placed levity in the more serious moments, and Stein’s insistence on calling his companion Ronald was also a nicely added in character trait for him.  This episode, and last weeks, are essentially a backdoor pilot for the Firestorm spin off that CW has been talking about since late in development for Flash, and after this, I seriously think it could be great.  Robbie Amell and Victor Garber play off each other well, not the best I have seen, but the whole young man/old man dynamic they have could lead to some truly hilarious moments for the two.

Barry’s learning of his eventual trip through time was a nicely done subplot for the episode, and did help to remind us that even though he may have taken a back seat plot line wise this episode, he is still the main character.  He ran through the emotional gambit after this reveal, starting with shock over the impossible news, acceptance of it and a desire to know more, sorrow over the idea that he is destined to fail his mother, and finally setting on hope that he will be able to save hiss mother’s life.  This was short, but great.  Allowing Barry’s story to progress, but still giving in a big enough role in the main story so he can continue to do the hero thing he have come to know and love.

Caitlin was interesting to watch here.  She was overjoyed to have her fiance back, as is to be expected, but at the same time, she has rebuilt her life without Ronnie in it, so his sudden return leaves her wondering what will happen.  Add in Ronnie’s desire for them to leave Central City behind, and you have a Caitlin worried for the future.  But, this did not drag anything down.  Everything about this felt natural in how it played out, with Caitlin having to once again readjust her life with the return of Ronnie, and in the end, being accepting, and almost happy, at his leaving.  As she said to Cisco, she had built a life she was happy with, and Ronnie not being able to stay in it, while upsetting for her, didn’t take anything away from it.  Instead, she is just happy he is alive and is looking forward to him returning to her life.  It was sweet, and sadly may have killed any chance of a Barry/Caitlin romance which I was hoping for, but hey, can’t have everything.

We were treated with a subplot of Iris at the newspaper and being encouraged by her partner to find out what is really happening at S.T.A.R. Labs.

Crater cuddles!

Crater cuddles!

This was uninteresting, and frankly unneeded.  This probably stems mostly from the simple fact that Iris is still just not an interesting character.  I see this particular plot leading to character drama as she tries to figure out what Barry and his friends are doing at the burnt out lab.  We will see her digging, probably a confrontation between her and Barry as she digs to deep and close to the truth, before finishing with her discovering that Barry is the Flash, and maybe some shoe horned in romance between the two.  Yeah, pass.  Seriously, I have said this before and I am going to say this again, Iris is the Laurel of this show, and they have taken far to long to do anything interesting with her character, so she is basically now just dead weight.  No offence Candace Patton who plays the character, she does it well, she just has an uninteresting character.

 

Overall, this was a fantastic follow up to last weeks episode, gave us great character moments, and added a new superhero to the universe that is being built between Arrow and Flash.  There was a fantastic continuation to Joe’s investigation that will lead into one of Flash’s more out there super powers, time travel, and what is a major story for Flash in the comics.  Heck we may even be getting a new show to help expand the world, we will see how things go with the proposed Firestorm spin off.

Sadly, we have a month to wait till the next new episode, where it appears Well’s secrets will be coming to life, so until that happens,

Goon out.

Snooty and Goon: Kingsman: The Secret Service

One of these things is not like the other. One of these things does not belong. Can you guess which thing is not like the other By the time I finish my song?

One of these things is not like the other.
One of these things does not belong.
Can you guess which thing is not like the other
By the time I finish my song?

This movie wasn’t marketed as a slick, hyper-violent spy pastiche full of exploding heads and misplaced father figure projecting, but by golly, the movie has both of those things in spades! Snooty and Goon dig into this latest comic-book-movie-that-isn’t-really-a-comic-book-movie adaptation looking for its deepest, darkest secrets. Too bad it wears everything on its sleeve.

Click here to become a proper gentleman!


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Spice champion of Central City: Goon Reviews Flash “The Nuclear Man”

Can Marvel nail us for this?  No?  Good.

Can Marvel nail us for this? No? Good.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Curse whoever invented the cliffhanger ending, curse them to the special level of hell reserved for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.

We depart from the usual Flash format, where we see Barry squaring off against a new super powered baddie and instead dealing with something a little closer to home, for everyone.  In the main story we see the continuation of the Ronnie/Firestorm subplot.  Team Flash has successfully discovered what happened to Ronnie, and who he merged with, a Professor Stein, who Barry reveals that he met briefly on a train the day the accelerator went boom.  He apparently made a favorable impression on the scientist because he mentions later that he remembers meeting him.  They are able track Stein down by way of his wife, who Stein has been watching in secret.  They bring him back to S.T.A.R. Labs and do their science thing on him.  Wells learns that the Ronnie part of the body is rejecting the Stein part and building up heat that will result in a thermonuclear explosion.  The only option, kill Ronnie/Stein before that happens.  Caitlin refuses this, not wanting to loose her fiance again, and after a brief consultation with his disembodied voice, Wells figures that he can re-purpose the stolen dark matter dohickey into a device that would safely separate the two.  However, Stein, hearing about his impending meltdown, runs away to avoid hurting anyone.  Barry and Caitlin rush out to the badlands after him, but and slap on the science MacGuffin on him to no avail.  Barry rushes them out as Ronnie goes boom in what was one of the best visuals of the show to date.  The episode closing out with General Eiling (last seen in the episode Plastique) sending out a response team to claim F.I.R.E.S.T.O.R.M.

In subplot one, Barry’s got a girlfriend!  This runs just about as well as you would expect.  The two have fun on their date, play off each other well, on the second date when things start heating up Barry has to rush out to handle Flash business.  Instead of getting angry Linda takes it in stride, and after a talk with Iris, believes it would be best to just walk away, thinking that Barry still has feelings for Iris.  Barry assures her this isn’t the case, even

I am sensing my least favorite geometric romantic shape showing up here

So yeah, that is totally some subtle symbolism right there.  Nothing can be gleaned from that at all.

eating the hottest pepper known to man to secure a second date, and the two patch things up.

In the final subplot, Joe brings in Cisco to help him solve Nora’s murder.  The two go to Barry’s old house and discover that a mirror in the room was there at the time of the murder, and because of weird sciencey reasons they are able to extract pictures from the materiel on the back of the mirror and convert it into a 3D hologram (again, weird sciencey stuff) this leads them to an old blood spatter on the wall they are able to extract two different blood types from.  Joe asks Cisco to run the samples against Wells, but Cisco refuses, not willing to believe that Wells could be a killer.  Later on, he does run the samples though, and discovers that one of them is a match for adult Barry.  (cue dramatic music here)

This was a really great episode, they have been teasing us with Firestorm for quite some time now, so actually getting an episode mostly centered on that story was fantastic to see.  The whole two in body thing was taken right out of the comics, and was a lot of fun to see play out.  Robbie Amell (who is the cousin of Stephen Amell aka Oliver Queen from Arrow) played the crazed fire starter fairly well, and did an even better job when he was stabilized thanks to a fancy drug cocktail.  It was a bit of an  odd experience seeing a young man act like a much older person, but it worked, Amell did it well and he was able to really bring out that awkwardness of a stranger being surrounded by people who know the body he is stuck in, but not him himself. (have I confused you yet?)  We sadly did not get a resolution to the story, they are obviously still building up the character for his planned spin off, so luckily we will get to see more him in the future.

In the romantic subplot, we got a fun break from the tension that was building with the Ronnie story.  Most of this very lighthearted, Cisco even making jokes about Barry being to fast.  This does take a turn for the mildly dramatic when Linda thinks that Barry’s odd behavior is from unresolved feelings for Iris.  They write this off quickly, Stein even giving Barry some advice on how to deal with the situation.  His end plan of eating the pepper to win the second date was a fun play off their first date in the beginning of episode, but it felt a bit wasted.  I feel they could have worked up more to this scene, maybe hold it off for an episode or two, that way making it a fun callback to a previous episode, but its obvious they didn’t want to spend to much time on this little relationship hiccup, so I understand why.  Regardless, it was still fun and cute to watch.  The only downside, was Iris at the end.  Her little downtrodden look upon seeing Barry and Linda kiss was just rage inducing.  She has never shown any interest in Barry outside of their friendship, so if she is going to start getting jealous because Barry doesn’t have unrequited feelings for her anymore I am gonna end up hating her

"So, we're gonna end up together right?" "Probably."

“So, we’re gonna end up together right?”
“Probably.”

character even more.  If they spin this as her just being worried about losing her friend, I can get behind that, and could lead to a sweet friendship moment between the two.

With Joe, it was a bit surprising to see him bring Cisco in, but makes sense.  He needs some tech help with investigation and wants to keep Barry out of it until he knows more, so that leaves Cisco.  This had some  amusing parts to it, the big one being the middle age divorcee who was hitting on Joe, and the neat hologram stuff.  The biggest part being Joe confiding in Cisco his suspicion of Wells.  Cisco response was spot on what I would expect from the character, the total denial that his friend and mentor could be a killer, but also showed that Cisco does not blindly follow his boss.  When Wells talks about killing Ronnie/Stein, Cisco shows that he has some doubts about Wells, and does indeed perform the blood test for Joe.  The reveal that Barry’s was there at the night of the murder is no surprise, as they have been advertising the time travel aspect of Flash for sometime now.  Still, it was nice build up for one of Flash’s big powers, and good forshadowing for future events.

Overall, this was a damn good episode, it balanced out the drama and humor, Barry had some positive steps in his new relationship, Firestorm was awesome, and great set up for future events.  The cliffhanger ending was annoying, because lord knows I hate those, and the potential love triangles building up will surely fill me with rage if/when they come to pass, but all in all, a great episode.

Goon out.

Snooty and Goon: Jupiter Ascending

Dog boy meets space princess. Dog boy falls in love with space princess. Dog boy loses space princess. Dog boy rescues space princess. Rinse and repeat until end credits.

Dog boy falls in love with space princess. Dog boy loses space princess. Dog boy rescues space princess. Rinse and repeat until end credits.

No horoscope nonsense here, just a couple of critics taking a (gravity-booted) run at the latest sci fi epic from the masterminds behind the Matrix. There’s no virtual reality and no color-coded pills, but anything else goes in this huge, beautiful, messy, flawed roller coaster of a movie. Wings and blue goo optional.

Click here to claim your space inheritance!


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Superspeed and vodka do not mix: Goon Reviews Flash “Crazy for You”

crazy-for-you-episode-the-flash-ruuuuun

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh my god, drunk Caitlin is best Caitlin!

Seriously, can we get some tie in web series that is just Barry and Caitlin having drunken karaoke adventures? I would watch the hell out of that.

So, this week seemed to be a bit of a hodge podge of random stuff, but that is not bad.  In the main plot of the episode we have Barry dealing with a teleporter who broke her boyfriend out of jail by the name of Shawna Baez, aka, Peek-a-Boo.  When Barry and Joe arrive at the empty cell to investigate Barry finds some odd residue from Baez’s teleporting and we are also treated to a touching moment between Barry and his dad, Joe having called in a favor so that Barry and his dad get actually get some face time. Back with the baddies, instead of doing the smart thing and getting the heck out of dodge, the boyfriend talks Shawna into committing acts of crime, he has a debt to pay off to a local crime boss and won’t leave until it’s done.  Barry confronts the duo in the middle of a robbery and is caught off guard by the Baez’s teleporting abilities, which gives the villainous a pair the chance to escape.  Barry’s dad asks a few questions around the prison to help his son, and is attack for his troubles.  Barry yanks the attacker out of prison and gets him to spill the beans on what the crime boss has in store for the teleporter and her boyfriend.  Wells and the smart people figure out that the Shawna’s power is tied into her vision, she has to be able to see to use her power.  When the bad guys are attempting to escape an armored truck robbery Barry chases them into a tunnel where he smashes the lights, plunging them into darkness and depriving her of her powers.  This closes out with Barry’s dad basically stating he knows that Barry is the Flash and how proud he is of him, a truly heartwarming moment.
We are also treated to several subplots this week.  Following up on Rathaway’s comments about Ronnie from lasts weeks “The Sound and the Fury” Cisco is trying to track down his fiery friend and save him.  He lets Rathaway out and the baddie walks Cisco through the events leading up to the accelerator explosion.  It is discovered that during the blast Ronnie was merged with a Professor Stein which is why he has been acting in a very un-Ronnie like manner in his past appearances.  Rathaway, being a bad guy, uses this opportunity to escape, but the others are quick to forgive Cisco

when they learn his motivations were to assuage his guilt over locking Ronnie in the accelerator.

In the final bit of subplot, we see Barry and Caitlin getting out there and trying to get over their respective heartache over Ronnie and Iris.  This involves a bar, karaoke, and a delightfully drunk Caitlin.  This is a brief bit, but fun to watch as the two cut loose and just have some fun together.  It crazy-for-you-episode-the-flash-superspeedculminates in Barry getting a girls number and bringing a drunk Caitlin home, where she urges Barry to call the girl, and says its okay if he peeked at her boobs.  Yeah, drunk Caitlin is hilarious, we need more of her.

All of this closes out with a nice tease for the future, Gorilla Grodd killing some people in the sewers.  Yeah, super smart talking gorilla is on the way, can’t wait.

All the parts of this episode where quite enjoyable.  Flash versus the baddies wasn’t exactly the most stand out confrontation the show has had, more following the basic formula of the encounter, figuring out the enemies powers, and finally countering them, but was still fun to watch.  Baez, aka Peek-A-Boo, is Flash villain that first showed up in 2002 as a medical student in Central City.  Her backstory was changed for this, instead she was just a girl with powers who wanted her boyfriend out of jail and then got dragged into the whole crime thing by him.  She was sort of a meh villain for the most part, but by the end was actually fairly sympathetic.  She was a person in love who was basically used by the person she thought loved her, only to be abandoned when he didn’t have a use for her.  It hit ya in the feels, which I believe was the point, it showed that not all of these villains are bad people who got powers, some where just normal people that ended up in a bad situation, something that The Flash has been really good about presenting to viewers.

The subplots this week were a lot of fun, focusing more on the characters than anything else.  With Cisco, it made it seem like he was trying to track down Ronnie for Caitlin’s sake, but the reveal that it was because he was still so angry at himself for locking Ronnie in, and his sense of loss over the fracturing of his self created family, it was actually kind of amazing.  It makes me want to know more about Cisco past, what it was that made him create a new family for himself at S.T.A.R. over whatever family he was born into.  Of all the characters, Cisco’s past is still the most mysterious, and this gave us our first good look into it.

Yeah, this won't be awkward at  all.

Yeah, this won’t be awkward at all.

With Caitlin and Barry, this was just plain old fun.  Seeing Caitlin cut loose and offer drunken advice to her friend was just hilarious.  The final part of the two back in her apartment with Barry helping her get ready for bed and her asking him to stay until she fell asleep was honestly  a touching moment between the characters.  This, combined with the smile she had on her face when she told Barry she needed to find someone new to be crazy about leads me to believe that we may just be seeing the beginnings of a Barry/Caitlin pairing, which I am all for.  That should totally happen.  Granted, we did meet a new love interest for Barry this week, a woman by the name of Linda Park, played by Malese Jow, how is a sports writer at the same newspaper that Iris works at.  Yeah, this gonna be fun.  We didn’t get much of her here, as this was just her introduction, so I can’t really say much about her character or have any real opinion on her.  I will say that its nice to not see Barry pining over Iris (lets be honest, she is the Laurel of this show) and I do happen to like Malese Jow, so I am interested in seeing how this will play out.

Overall, this was a strong character episode, there were some fantastic moments, new insights into some characters motivations, and drunk Caitlin!  Seriously, never letting that one go, it was hilarious.  While not the most action packed episode, it was fun one and played to the strengths of the actors and characters.

Goon out.

Snooty and Goon: The Loft

Our main characters, who appear to know and care as much about what's going on in the movie as the audience does.

Our main characters, who appear to know and care as much about what’s going on in the movie as the audience does.

Boys will be boys, but the “Bad” Boys of cinema don’t cotton to this meandering movie, whose confusing premise and lackluster performances leave them scratching their heads. What’s worse than a thriller with shitty gender politics? A thriller with shitty gender politics that forgets to be thrilling.

Click here to claim your key to The Loft!

Ending song: Bang Bang Bangity Bang from the How I Met Your Mother Soundtrack
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Run All Night

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The Gunman

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